Tuesday, May 12, 2009
That really is a F.....g Bear!!
This post was inspired by my blogging friend Yael. She was reminiscing about things she had done in her life and I decided to share this amusing story. During my teenage years I was heavily involved in wrestling. At one point I was actually pretty good. Mind you in this instance it was obvious that my Testosterone far outweighed my talent. Passing through town one weekend was a small "Wrestling troupe", kind of like a tiny version of WWE. Also included with the so called "real" wrestlers, they had a "wrestling bear" and if anyone out there was brave(stupid) enough they could come up and challenge it. Well this is where I decided that I could take on the bear. I was 15 and chalk full of Bravado and minus a few brain cells. Reminds me of the joke, "Instant Idiot, just add testosterone." So before my rational brain could kick in, I jumped into the ring. There was a hardy round of applause. I guess everyone but me knew what was about to happen. The trainer in the ring informed me about no punching or kicking. Of course I knew that, I was an Olympic wrestler, just the suggestion was offensive. He then proceeded to tell me what the bear could(would) do to me. I was undaunted, afterall I was undefeated up to that point of the year. Well, here I was standing 15 feet away from a real live bear, though it was muzzled and declawed it was quite an imposing figure. My first thought was, "Oh my G-d, thats a fu..... Bear. So here I wade into battle, the bear reaches out with its paw to grab me and Wham it strikes me in the nose. Just as quickly as I realize Im bleeding the freaking thing now has me by the neck and is pulling me quickly to the ground. In my delusional mind I believe I can stop it but I fail to consider that it outweighs me by 300 pounds and quickly I am face down and pinned. The trainer comes over and then gets the beast off of me. Ah the joy of youth. Makes for some lasting impressions to say the least.